Nothing stands in the way of my relationship with God like unconfessed sin, and I had a lot of it. I was rationalizing the hedonistic lifestyle I had grown used to. It was so easy to live life according to my own rules and call on God's grace and forgiveness when I would mess up. But the fruit of the Spirit - the evidence of my life in Christ includes self-control.
If I'm not exercising self-control, I'm not living by the Spirit. I know how frustrated I get as a teacher when kids take advantage of the grace we give them. They won't study for Test A in Mastery because they know that they have Test B and C. And it drives me crazy that they use and abuse the system to their advantage! Those tests are there so if you don't understand all the material at first, you have multiple chances. Not to give you a sneak peak as to what the test will look like when you actually do study.
Just like the child who calls, "base!" in a game of tag and never leaves the safe zone, so is one who cries, "grace!" time after time of intentional, willful disobedience with no thought of discipline. He will never get a chance to experience the thrill of playing in God's game, the game we all win. He will never get to feel the joy of being on God's victorious team until he makes an effort to try.
For it is in trying and failing that we can truly appreciate the mercy and grace of God. And trying is not easy. Make no mistake about that. The fear of failure keeps many from ever leaving "base." But as for myself, I would rather a life of bold, desperate failures in the name of God than one of safety and comfort in the name of Corrie. I am tired of using and abusing the system. The time has come to choose a life of discipline, a life of boldness, a life worthy of that which I have been called to.
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